


Traces of Memories

by Bbaegi



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Chanyeol is kind of an asshole but not really, M/M, Smut, ceo!au, really cliché tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 20:04:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9674012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bbaegi/pseuds/Bbaegi
Summary: Everyone had that one person in their life, someone who you could never forget. Sometimes you wouldn't be able to forget them because they were weird enough to settle in your mind and never leave, sometimes because they made you happier than you had ever been, and sometimes because they had left a big scar that still sometimes stung in your chest.The one person that Baekhyun would never be able to forget had both made him the happiest man ever and the most miserable he had ever been. Which is why he was slowly but surely working towards erasing him from his mind, bits by bits, memory by memory.However, his hard work was destroyed when he found himself working for the man who was now way above him, way more powerful than he used to be, and completely different than the person he had loved with all his heart in the past.





	

Not a lot of people had the chance to choose a job that they would spend the rest of their life with happily, it was even something quite difficult to do nowadays but fortunately, Baekhyun wasn’t one of those people. Working as a secretary wasn’t always the easiest thing, it was stressful, demanded a lot of work, and it was either a hit or a miss. He had been lucky enough to find a job as soon as he graduated and even if it hadn’t been his dream job either, he appreciated it. He liked being useful and busy, it made him unable to focus on things that weren’t related to his work, such as the suffocating loneliness that awaited him every night once he stepped into his house. 

It had been exactly one year since he had started working for Park Corporation and never once had he felt the need to complain about anything. The pay was just enough for him to live comfortably on his own and he couldn’t afford much luxuries but he was able to eat three meals a day everyday and for now, that was all he needed. 

However, maybe those weren’t even close to being the reason why he liked his job so much. If you were to ask him what he liked the most about working at Park Corporation, he might reply that it was his boss. Though, he probably wouldn’t say that out loud as it was far from being professional. Kim Jongdae was what you could call the perfect example of a wonderful boss who cared about his employees’ wellbeing and spread warmth and comfort wherever he went, a smile never lingering too far away from his lips. He was kind, way too kind and if everyone had an angel in their life, Baekhyun could confidently say that the one in his was Kim Jongdae. His boss was liked by everyone and the company had this lighthearted and casual mood thanks to him, he made everything sound so easy and even if you did a mistake, he wouldn’t fire you on the spot. He would lecture you gently and make sure to teach you how not to make the same mistake again. There was probably not a single employee who didn’t like the CEO but maybe he liked him in a different way than everyone else did.

It wasn’t surprising for him to arbor such feelings for Jongdae after all the time he spent with him as his secretary, the late night talks about meetings and business, the way he depended on Baekhyun more than necessary, all the information he had gathered about his habits and his likes. He was such a nice person, with no ill intentions, and it was impossible for him not to fall for his handsome smile.

For all those reasons, the past days hadn’t been the best at all.

The only problem with Jongdae was that he wasn’t supposed to be the CEO of Park Corporation, he had taken that role for far too long already and it was time for him to give the throne to its rightful heir. He wasn’t directly related to the former CEO who had passed away in a car crash exactly two years ago, he was merely a well-trusted family friend who had been the only solution when the CEO’s seat was left vacant. He heard through some colleagues that the deceased man’s son had just turned twenty two when his father had died and he was nowhere near ready to lead the gigantic empire that was Park Corporation, the company’s board had then decided that Kim Jongdae who had already been working in the company for several years was the perfect man to take over until the deceased’s son finished his studies and was deemed ready to take over.

It seemed that the time had come and gone already, yesterday had been Jongdae’s last day as the CEO and he had decided to take some time away from work after that, it had drained him a lot for the past two years and never had he complained about it so Baekhyun personally thought that the rest was well-deserved. However, he hadn’t been happy about his leave, Jongdae had been a big part of his life and sometimes, they went past the professional line and Jongdae had called him a friend way too many times for him not to rejoice about it. Moreover, most employees shared the same feeling of sadness over Jongdae’s departure, he would be missed. 

However, the most dreadful thing about this sudden change was the fact that no one exactly knew anything about the new CEO, he was rarely seen in public, he had rarely visited the company when his father was still alive, there wasn’t anything completely sure about him. Baekhyun hadn’t even managed to catch his full name which was extremely surprising. It was quite stressful for him, considering the fact that he was the one who was supposed to work with him the most as his secretary, unless he decided to fire Baekhyun and get a new secretary, which he hoped wouldn’t happen.

Either way he was going to find out today since it was the new CEO’s first day. If he managed to get there on time and avoided getting fired by him as soon as he would see his face.

Today was going to be a really bad day and the mere fact that he had slept in instead of waking up in time was the proof of that. He was supposed to wake up at 7AM to make sure that he would arrive there before the new CEO but his alarm hadn’t went off and now, he was running through the hallway to catch the elevator before the doors closed. He was already half an hour late and if he had to take the stairs, he would probably die on the way there. It wouldn’t even be worth it since he wouldn’t be running into Jongdae’s office but a stranger’s.

Luckily, he managed to walk into the elevator before its doors closed and he could get a few seconds of rest on the way up to the ninth floor, ignoring the weird stares throw his way by the two women standing at the other corner of the elevator. While his breath slowly went back to normal, he was cursing himself inwardly. The CEO’s first impression of him was now ruined, how was he even going to make the man forgive the fact that he was late on his first day? He was supposed to welcome him along with the other employees who would work with him closely but all he would get was probably a lecture, if he was lucky.

A small ding snapped him out of his dark thoughts and he took a deep breath as the elevator’s doors opened to let its occupants out, the two women going to the opposite way as he headed to Jongdae’s office- the new CEO’s office, he corrected herself. His steps were quick, a million thoughts rushing through his mind as he already started thinking of where to apply for a new job, there was no way he would be forgiven. Now standing in front of the door, he took a deep breath again, preparing his apology speech in his head before raising his hand to knock on the door.

However, before he could even do it, the door opened on its own and he was met with the comforting sight of Jongdae’s smile which, as unexpected as it was, managed to take away half of the nervousness weighing down on his shoulders. 

"Mr. Kim-" he started only to get interrupted by the former CEO’s energetic voice.

"Here you are, Baekhyun! I thought you weren’t going to come," he smiled and he could see the hint of relief in his features before it was replaced by mischievousness. "I was about to think that you couldn’t bear the thought of working with someone else and decided to resign," he continued, voice laced with amusement. 

Oh if only he knew.

"Of course not," he replied, laughing awkwardly before clearing his throat as Jongdae stepped back into the room to let him in. "I’m so sorry for being late, I don’t even have an excuse but I really apologize. It’s not professional at all and I totally would understand if you’re angry at me because I was supposed to be here for Mr. Park’s first day and welcome him with everyone else but I made a mistake and now-"

"Stop apologizing," a cold voice cut his nervous rambling and instantly, he froze after realizing that it sounded familiar to his ears. "It only makes us waste more time."

His gaze landed on the source of the familiar voice and his breath hitched when he saw the man settled behind the desk, his heart pounding in his chest as he took in his painfully familiar features with surprise. He had matured, his features were sharper but he was still the same person, with his ears that were sticking out too much, the same wide eyes and dark orbs making Baekhyun squirm as they focused on him, and his plump lower lip. He was still so handsome, maybe even more handsome than the day he had put an end to their relationship when they were still in high school, a sudden decision that had left Baekhyun heart broken. It happened more than six years ago, but how could he forget his first love?

"Well, mistakes can happen and I can promise Mr. Park that this is the first time Baekhyun has ever been late in the two years we have worked together. I’m sure this won’t happen again, right?" Jongdae asked him, disturbing the sudden heavy silence that had settled over the room. 

However, Baekhyun wasn’t even able to register his words, he couldn’t take his eyes off the man in front of him even if every inch of his being pushed him to look away and run out of the room. He couldn’t bring himself to do that, he was too busy looking at the person carrying the name that came to his mind as soon as he heard the word ‘heartbreak’ even if he could feel pain prickling along his skin and seeping into his veins like a poison ready to take his breath away. What was he doing here? He would have never thought that they would encounter each other again after all this time, yet alone in this kind of situation. 

"I hope this won’t happen again, I’m not keen on keeping employees who aren’t even able to do something as simple as arriving to work on time," the young CEO’s voice cut through the thick silence, each word slamming into Baekhyun and piercing his heart like ice spikes that left its broken pieces frozen and unable to function without pumping pain into his body with each beat.

He wasn’t used to hearing such cold and cruel words from Chanyeol, their relationship had been so loving, so perfect, just like a dream. But that was what it ended up being, a dream that he had been snatched away from with a brutal wake up. That was when he wondered if Chanyeol didn’t remember him? Or maybe he was just pretending not to know him? He had looked at him rather insistently and he was sure that he had seen a glint of recognition in his eyes earlier. He wasn’t sure what was worse between him not recognizing Baekhyun and him acting like he didn’t. 

"It… It won’t happen again, Mr. Park. I’m sorry," he apologized again, tilting his head down a bit to avoid his gaze.

"Get to work, don’t waste more time. Bring me my schedule as soon as you can," the other replied, voice still as aloof.

He simply nodded, lightning his hands into fists to prevent them from shaking and focusing on the slight sting left behind by his nails digging into his palms in order to ignore the way his eyes started stinging a bit. If Chanyeol had decided to act like they didn’t know each other, then he would go along with it. Crying over someone who didn’t care was useless.

"Alright!" Jongdae suddenly said, an awkward chuckle escaping him. "I guess I’ll get going too then, you both are going to be busy. Baekhyun, see me out?" he asked, a light smile on his lips as he looked at the secretary again.

Without hesitating, he nodded, jumping on the occasion to escape from the suffocating office and following Jongdae out of the door. The latter managed to make him feel better no matter what and right now, he needed to stay away from Chanyeol and the painful memories that his eyes held.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After a few encouraging words and an apologetic smile, Jongdae had left and with it, the only ounce of comfort that Baekhyun had been clinging to ever since he had stepped into his new boss’ office had disappeared. He almost wanted to cling to the man and beg him to keep working here, not to leave him alone with someone he had never wanted to see again. However, he couldn’t do that, Jongdae might have become a friend to him along the years but that’s what it stopped at and he couldn’t do anything to keep him here, it would be ridiculous of him to even try. He could only seek comforting words through text messages and hope that Jongdae would come visit them again in the near future.

Maybe he should just resign and start looking for a new job? That would be cowardly of him but he was okay with being a coward as long as it saved him from the aching pain of having Chanyeol so close to him again after all this time. That wouldn’t be a wise decision though, it would be hard for him to find another job in a short time, especially one with a decent pay. His current job was also his only source of income and if he gave up on it, he wouldn’t even be able to survive for a month, he hadn’t even had the occasion to save up yet.

Moreover, why would he be the one who had to leave? Chanyeol didn’t seem affected by the situation at all, it was as if he didn’t even remember Baekhyun who seemed to be the only one to even feel pained by Chanyeol’s sudden appearance. He didn’t want the latter to see how painful it was, he didn’t need to know that even after all these years, he carried the memory of their history in his heart. If he was able to act as if nothing had happened, then Baekhyun would be able to do the same. He could forget him as easily as Chanyeol had forgotten him.

With that in mind, he got to work, chasing his dark thoughts away by focusing on the many things he had to do, one of them being bringing the CEO’s schedule to him as soon as possible. He would have to get used to spending time with him and working  _for_  him. 

It only took him a few minutes to prepare Chanyeol’s schedule as it had already been mostly done the day before, he was also used to this and he was good in what he was doing so he knew that at least, the other wouldn’t have a problem with this. However, he suddenly remembered that he had a morning ritual with Jongdae. When he was still working as the CEO, Baekhyun used to bring him a cup of coffee every morning, the man would even jokingly say that he wouldn’t be able to start his day happily without the bitter drink personally brought by his secretary. Would Chanyeol like coffee too? It was part of his job to bring coffee to his boss, no matter how ridiculous it had sounded to Baekhyun in his early days of work, and if he went by that logic he had to do the same thing for Chanyeol, right? He could at least try, even if he knew that Chanyeol never drank coffee in the past. However, that was when they were in high school and it would be ridiculous of him to base his acts on the Chanyeol from his past, he had apparently never even known him anyway and Baekhyun allowed himself to say this based on how sudden and nonsensical their break up had seemed to him. If Chanyeol didn’t like coffee, he would probably tell him anyway, he didn’t seem to have a problem with rudely expressing his thoughts.

With that in mind, the secretary quickly went to the cafeteria that was located downstairs, asking for a a cup of coffee that he knew would be delicious. He didn’t like coffee and had never even tasted the cafeteria’s but everyone always praised their cooking and the drinks they served so he assumed that it wasn’t that bad, which was weird for a company but Park Corp. was the most powerful company in South Korea and no one should really be surprised with how good they treated their employees.

Once he was done, he headed upstairs again, stepping in front of Chanyeol’s office and taking a deep breath, filling his lungs with air and his mind with courage. He hesitated for a few seconds before the image of Chanyeol’s cold expression as he acted like he didn’t know Baekhyun came back to him, angering him enough for him to seek courage from the feeling. Knocking on the door, he waited for a reply before opening the door and walking in.

"Mr. Park, I prepared your schedule," he said, doing his best to keep his voice aloof and steady.

"Thank you, please bring it to me," the other replied, voice still as cold as it had been earlier this morning, not even sparing Baekhyun a glance.

He gulped, nearing closer to the CEO with slow steps and taking the occasion to observe him even if he knew he shouldn’t be looking at him more than necessary. He looked nice. He was so different from the Chanyeol he remembered, the student who walked around in skinny jeans, a snapback often hiding his red hair, and a cocky smirk permanently clinging to his lips except for when he looked at Baekhyun with a gentle and loving smile. Gone was that boy, the person standing in front of him was a man. What he saw as he looked at Chanyeol was a business man who didn’t even have the time to look up from his computer as he was talking, his black suit making him look like a model straight out of a fashion magazine. His black hair was pushed back, exposing the frown of concentration that was etched on his handsome features and to anyone, it might look a little bit scary but Baekhyun knew that the frown could quickly disappear if you knew how to make him smile, Chanyeol had always been a rather happy and carefree person. His shoulders were broader than he remembered, he had grown up but Baekhyun hadn’t grown out of the effect he had on him if the way his heartbeat got louder with every step he took towards him was any indication. 

"You need to give me the schedule, not just stand there and stare at me."

With that single sentence, the shorter snapped out of his thoughts, noticing that a few seconds had passed since he stopped in front of the other’s desk. Embarrassment instantly filled him, and he looked away from him, mumbling out an apology as he handed him the printed schedule.

"You have a meeting with the board later this afternoon and several phone calls to make after that but otherwise, you don’t have much to do this morning besides working on a few files," he said, inwardly congratulating himself when his voice managed to go back to its usual professional tone without showing how his heart was about to jump out of his ribcage. "A meeting also needs to be scheduled for the new project we are working on, I will see where it fits in your schedule for this week and inform you of the different options. I assume Mr. Kim talked to you about this particular project?" he asked, doing his best not to look at him again even if he might look ridiculous or disrespectful by talking to his boss without making eye contact. 

"Yeah, he did. Thank you. You may go back to your own office now," he answered, looking at the schedule instead of his computer screen this time. At least he wasn’t the only one who wanted to avoid eye contact, he thought bitterly.

Only then did he finally notice that his hand was growing uncomfortably warm, causing him to remember that he was holding a cup of coffee in his hand. His irritation only took new levels when he realized that Chanyeol was still able to make him forget everything around him in a split second, but he cleared his throat, remaining in his spot instead of leaving like the CEO had asked, causing the latter to finally look up at Baekhyun, expression blank as always.

"Uhm… I also brought coffee. I used to bring coffee to Mr. Kim every morning and I thought I should do so for you too. However, if you don’t drink coffee, don’t hesitate to tell me," he explained, in his most formal tone possible even if it still felt so weird to talk to the person he had once fallen in love with like this.

"Thanks. Put it there," the other simply replied, nodding towards an empty spot on his desk and Baekhyun weirdly had the urge to pour the scalding hot drink down his head. However, that wouldn’t be professional therefore he simply put the cup down and without waiting another second, he turned around, forcing himself to walk slowly instead of running out of the office, when Chanyeol’s aloof voice made him stop in his tracks again.

"One last thing, Mr. Byun. Let’s keep things professional."

Silence settled in the room after the young man’s words and really, Baekhyun should have expected to hear such things but he still hadn’t been able to avoid the pain prickling his heart like a million of needles, cutting his breath and making him unable to utter a single word. 

So Chanyeol did remember him, he just wanted to act like nothing had happened between them in the past. That was okay. He could bear with that. It’s not like he wanted to remember those times either. 

"Of course, Mr. Park," he forced himself to reply, not wanting the latter to think his words had hurt him even if Baekhyun hadn’t felt this amount of pain in such a long time. With that, he resumed his steps, biting his lower lip to prevent himself from saying anything that he might regret as he felt anger and heartbreak tug on the water beads that had gathered in his eyes. He kept them in however, he wouldn’t cry for someone who definitely wasn’t worth it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The following days have been a blur for Baekhyun who did his best to focus on his work and  _kept things professional_ , shoving the unnecessary feelings into a forgotten corner of his heart and ignoring them as much as he could. That task wasn’t even that difficult, Chanyeol rarely even looked at him when they had to interact and even if it pained him, he appreciated it. Having to look into his dark and mesmerizing orbs  would only make this worse and at least this way, he didn’t have to acknowledge the fact that he was working for his first love who happened to be his first heartbreak as well.

 

Days passed this way, followed by weeks and he was slowly getting used to this, the situation becoming more bearable even if he would have felt a thousand times better if he didn’t have to do this. Surprisingly, Chanyeol wasn’t such a bad boss. He was professional, efficient, and the company didn’t suffer at all from the change of CEOs, on the contrary things were getting even a bit better than they had been with Jongdae, which said a lot since the latter had been a perfect leader to the big empire that was Park Corp. Not once did either of them mention anything regarding the past and it was better this way, it would be useless to say anything. 

 

Despite being cold as always, Chanyeol didn’t treat him in a particularly bad way. He treated him just like he treated every other employee in the building and Baekhyun didn’t know whether he should rejoice or not. It wasn’t like he minded anyway. Or at least that’s what he was trying to convince himself of. 

 

It was gradually becoming easier to work with him even if a tinge of pain constantly pinched his heart whenever he was in the same room as him, or whenever he heard his deep and stern voice. He could do this, it wasn’t like he ever hoped that they would somehow go back to how they were in the past, Baekhyun wouldn’t be able to forgive Chanyeol for suddenly dumping him with such cruel words. He hadn’t been good enough for him at that time, Chanyeol never actually talked about his family or anything like that but he made it clear the day of their break up that they were too different, that they didn’t suit each other, and that he was too good for Baekhyun. It was even worse now, he was the rich and powerful CEO of an important company and Baekhyun was a mere secretary who worked for him. He came in terms with that and it didn’t hurt as much, he could ignore it now.

 

More than a month had passed this way and just like every other day, Baekhyun knocked on his boss’ door a bit before lunchtime to get him to sign some papers. After waiting for a reply that almost immediately came, he opened the door and stepped in.

 

"Mr. Park, Mr. Lee asked me to get you to sign these papers. It’s about the last details before the launching of our project," he explained, far more comfortable than he had been on the first day.

 

"If everything goes right, we’re launching it next Monday, right?" Chanyeol asked, taking the files from him and trailing his eyes over the inked papers as his hand already reached for a pen. 

 

"Yes, a last meeting has been scheduled for Friday morning but besides that, everything is settled."

 

"Wonderful," the other replied absentmindedly as he signed at the bottom of the sheet of paper.

 

"Everything is actually going wonderfully well," the secretary hummed softly.

 

"That’s because I’m the CEO," he replied absentmindedly and Baekhyun couldn’t help but smile at his familiar confidence. Some things never changed, he thought.

 

Weirdly, they still had trouble looking at each other, which was odd considering the fact that they acted like strangers but Baekhyun was most of the time the one to look away as soon as their eyes would meet. He kept telling himself that this was the right thing to do. At least, Chanyeol wasn’t as cold as he used to be and sometimes, he could even see a tiny smile tugging at the corners of his lips, his voice wasn’t as icy as it used to be either and that was enough, it was less painful than the way he had treated Baekhyun on the first day.

 

"Thank you," Baekhyun said, taking the files back from him and stepping back with the intention of heading out when his gaze caught the cup of coffee on a corner of his desk. It was still full and obviously cold, he remembered bringing it this morning like he did everyday. This wasn’t the first time that Baekhyun had noticed the cups that he would bring in the morning still full at other times of the day, mostly in the morning. He guessed that Chanyeol got rid of them when lunch time hit and he went out to eat with colleagues, friends, or business partners. It was odd though, he obviously didn’t drink it but he never asked Baekhyun to stop bringing him coffee in the morning. It made him extremely confused since he knew Chanyeol wasn’t the kind to hide it when something displeased him.

 

"You didn’t drink your coffee," Baekhyun commented, finally letting curiosity take over his hesitation. 

 

The businessman stopped typing on his computer, looking up at the secretary instead and letting his gaze meet his for a few silent seconds in which Baekhyun suddenly regretted asking that question. Would it be what would finally make Chanyeol angry at him? He couldn’t even listen to his own suppositions as he was too mesmerized by the other’s strong gaze. It had been a few seconds but none of them looked away yet, something that happened for the first time, something that made stupid butterflies stir awake in Baekhyun’s stomach.

 

"I didn’t," was Chanyeol’s only reply before he looked to his computer screen again, breaking their eye contact and making it easier for Baekhyun to breath. As if the butterflies flying around in his stomach weren’t enough, he also felt his cheeks warm up, letting him know that they were probably reddening by now. He hated his own stupid reaction but he focused on his curiosity that hadn’t been quenched by the young businessman’s reply.

 

"You never drink them, I always see them full on your desk," he continued, carefully as if afraid of the taller’s reaction. He didn’t know whether he would suddenly get angry or find him disrespectful.

 

"I don’t drink coffee," Chanyeol finally replied after a few awkwardly silent seconds, rendering Baekhyun surprised even if he had expected those words. It still didn’t make sense.

 

"Then why didn’t you tell me? I wouldn’t have brought you coffee every morning," he furrowed his eyebrows, a bit upset that he had been wasting the drink all this time. 

 

"I didn’t want to just waste your efforts on the first day and I never really thought about telling you after that either. You seemed to really like taking care of me by bringing me coffee every morning," he replied, turning his gaze away from the secretary and focusing on his computer screen again.

 

Baekhyun couldn’t find any word to say for a few seconds, he was even confused about what to think of Chanyeol’s words. His first sentence weirdly made him feel nice, as if he has cared enough not to waste Baekhyun’s efforts – even if not drinking the coffee he brought was still a waste of his efforts – and his heart fluttered, a feeling so familiar when he was with Chanyeol but yet so foreign as he hadn’t felt this way in years. And he shouldn’t feel such a thing again, especially not because of Chanyeol. However, he wasn’t sure how to take his last words as his tone had been flat as always but as he observed him, he could see the tiny hint of mischievousness in the faint smile that was decorating his lips, a sight familiar to Baekhyun as well, Chanyeol used to constantly tease him and play around with him when they were younger. It was the first time he had ever seen a similarity between the Chanyeol he had loved in the past and the powerful man that was in front of him, and Baekhyn was oddly relieved to see that he hadn’t changed that much.

 

However, he shouldn’t be. This didn’t mean anything, it shouldn’t mean anything. He didn’t want to meet the Chanyeol from his past again, that Chanyeol had hurt him more than anyone else had ever been able to and he didn’t want to go through that pain again. He wasn’t supposed to feel anything towards his _boss._

 

"I’m just doing my job," he finally replied, forcing his voice to remain aloof.

 

"Right. You’re doing your job," the other mumbled, Baekhyun frowning when he could detect hints of bitterness in his voice. Why would he be bitter? Did his reply upset him? It was probably just his imagination though, Chanyeol made it clear that he didn’t want anything to do with him years ago.

 

"I won’t bring you coffee in the morning anymore, I’m sorry."

 

"No. I want you to continue bringing it," he quickly said, the secretary’s frown deepening in confusion. Why would he want his to get him coffee if he wasn’t going to drink it?

 

"But it’s a waste-"

 

"This is my company. I am allowed to waste the coffee that I pay for if I want to, and no one can complain about it," Chanyeol’s stern voice resonated in the room and Baekhyun’s chest ached a bit at how bratty it sounded, so similar to when Chanyeol would whine about homework or get moody in the past.

 

Once again, he was reminiscing the past. Something that he couldn’t help but find pathetic.

 

"Of course. You can do as you please, Mr. Park," he replied through gritted teeth. He wasn’t angry at him, he didn’t have any reason to be at the moment, he was angry at himself for stupidly clinging onto something meaningless.

 

"You may go back to work now, Mr. Byun," was the only thing Chanyeol said and for the first time, Baekhyun didn’t feel like it was said in a degrading way at all. Or maybe he was starting to grow a liking to the way Chanyeol pronounced his last name.

 

Conflicting emotions ran through Baekhyun as he turned around to leave the office, his whole being ripping apart as two sides of him fought to death with each other, not minding the fact that Baekhyun was the one taking each painful hit. On the one hand, he was happy. Happy because this conversation had gone better than he thought it would, because it had allowed him to see remnants of the boy he had loved in the man he had become, because it left him more hopeful than it should have. However, the bigger, smarter side of him, was doing its best to erase the other side, pushing it away with thoughts of his own stupidity. Why was he getting ahead of himself? Why did he still try finding his Chanyeol in the Chanyeol that lived in the present? He was pathetically looking too much into everything, he was paying too much attention to meaningless details.

 

He wasn’t supposed to even want to get his hopes up. Chanyeol had dumped him, cruelly, without any mercy, so suddenly, and without any hesitation. He had managed to shatter the heart that Baekhyun had allowed him to settle into and the latter hadn’t even been able to completely fix it yet, it was still so fragile, so easy to break all over again. He wouldn’t allow that to happen, he wouldn’t allow himself to run into another heartbreak. He had to suffocate the tiny little spark of fire that was still living inside him and reaching towards Chanyeol.

 

In spite of his newfound determination, he wasn’t able to stop himself from replacing the cups of coffee by bigger cups of hot cocoa, choosing to switch to what he remembered to be one of Chanyeol’s favorite drinks instead of totally dropping their morning ritual. As he happened to catch the cups that he would bring in the morning, completely empty at other times of the day, he knew that it had been a wise decision that made him happier than it should have.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Days passed and things only got better after that but oddly, Baekhyun didn’t exactly feel good about it. He would catch the same small smile on Chanyeol’s lips more often, his tone eventually growing less aloof and warmer, almost to the point that the secretary was able to make out a few hints of playfulness, sometimes friendliness in his usually cold voice. As much as it made him happy, it worried him too since without even being able to stop himself, he was warming up to the young businessman, his body less tense whenever he was around him, words falling off his lips more easily and sometimes, Baekhyun even found himself responding to his witty and amusing jokes. He never really thought that being professional meant acting like strangers with your colleagues or boss but more than once, he noted that maybe they were acting too casual for two people who had loved each other in the past, one of them leaving a permanent scar on the other’s heart. 

 

However, the worst part of it was probably the fact that Baekhyun enjoyed what they had and would feel devastated if one day, Chanyeol suddenly went back to being as cold as he had been on the first day. He was quickly getting attached to something that probably didn’t even mean anything to the other and he had settled with the fact that his heart still carried traces of the love he once bore for Chanyeol but it wasn’t supposed to be anything more than that, they were both really different people now. He was determined to keep things under control.

 

Moreover, he had to focus on his work more than anything else at the moment, things got really busy since the launching of the project the company had been working on for months now. Chanyeol barely had time to get lunch and consequently, Baekhyun’s workload only got heavier with phone calls to make, appointments to schedule, files to work on in order to help the CEO out… In short, he didn’t have time to be stupid. 

 

That day, like many others, he had to stay past the work hours in order to catch up on everything and make sure that things would be ready for the day after. His eyes were starting to hurt from staring at his computer screen for too long, he had forgotten to take his reading glasses this morning and now he was living its consequences, his eyelids fluttering with the intention of closing and not opening for a few hours. He was tired. His gaze flickered to the clock at a corner of his screen and his eyes widened a bit when he noticed that it was already past 9PM, he had been too focused to even notice that everyone had left. Sighing softly, he raised his arms up over his head to stretch them, a soft groan of tiredness slipping past his parted lips. It was time to go home now.

 

Turning his computer off, he made sure to put everything he would need in his bag before standing up and stepping around his desk to head towards the door. However, he stopped in his tracks when his eyes noticed the light coming from Chanyeol’s office and he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, wondering if the other had forgotten to turn it off when he left earlier. He hadn’t even seen him leave though, but he knew that once he was focused on something, his surroundings simply disappeared. He stepped towards the office, opening the door without knocking since he was sure that Chanyeol would have left by now, he was hardworking but not enough to stay past working hours, he would leave his office as soon as the clock hit 6PM everyday, not a minute earlier, nor a minute later. 

 

However, he found himself surprised when his gaze fell on a hunched figure on the desk once the door was opened and for a few seconds, he stood there, frozen, as he watched Chanyeol fast asleep, his head resting on his arms as they were folded over the hard surface of the desk. He looked really tired and it was really unusual for him to stay for so long, Baekhyun guessed that work had taken its toll on him. He still looked handsome even like this though, actually without the usual seriousness or haughtiness staining his features, replaced by the peaceful expression that sleep masked him with when it took him away, he looked more relaxed, younger even, so similar to the Chanyeol in Baekhyun’s past. The bright lightenings made his unblemished skin glow, his hair that was for once not styled back was brushing his eyelashes, looking soft enough for Baekhyun to have the sudden urge to run his fingers through it. He had gotten rid of his jacket, leaving it draped around his seat, an opened file was resting under his arms, indicating that he had obviously dozed off while still working on it. He looked tired and Baekhyun hoped that he would be able to get more rest soon, he could feel his chest prickling in concern. 

 

He shook the feeling off, stepping further into the room and putting his bag on the small table right in front of the desk. He should probably wake Chanyeol up, he couldn’t spend the night here and if he stayed in his position for too long, his back might hurt. He was just being a normal human being and caring about another person’s wellbeing, anyone would have done that if they were in his shoes. It didn’t have anything to do with the conflicting emotions he felt towards Chanyeol. 

 

After spending a few seconds on convincing himself of those facts, he quietly stepped around the desk to stand next to the sleeping young man, his heartbeat gradually quickening as he took a few more seconds to observe him from there, the shortened distance between them allowing him to appreciate Chanyeol’s handsome and youthful features once again. However, he quickly got a grip of himself and hesitantly brought a hand up to rest it on the other’s shoulder, gently shaking him in an attempt to wake him up.

 

"Mr. Park, wake up," he called out, voice not louder than a whisper since he didn’t want to startle him. However, the CEO didn’t even flinch and Baekhyun suddenly remembered that Chanyeol was a heavy sleeper, he used to have a habit of being late to class when they were still in high school. "Mr. Park," he tried again, louder as he put more strength into his movement while shaking him. A barely audible grunt escaped the man’s lips and Baekhyun pulled his hand away quickly in a startled movement as he watched his once peaceful expression morph into a frown of discontent. His eyes were still shut however, and Baekhyun knew that he wasn’t awake yet, he wouldn’t leave dreamland so easily. 

 

Suddenly, the furnitures around them disappeared, the office morphing into Baekhyun’s old bedroom, walls turning a light blue color instead of the professional white he was used to, the desk disappearing to be replaced by familiar sheets, the formal clothes shrouding his body changing into an oversized shirt that smelled of the perfume he had bought for Chanyeol when they had first gotten together, and the white shirt Chanyeol was wearing disappearing to expose his skin as it peeked from under the blanket here and there. Years ago, they would often start their mornings like that, with Baekhyun waking Chanyeol up as fast as possible to make sure they wouldn’t be late to class. "Chanyeol," he then called out, voice carrying fondness, each letter of the name he had once loved carrying the memories of their hearts beating in synch, each syllable formed by his lips carrying the traces of smiles, laughter, tears, and heartbreak. 

 

Heartbreak. 

 

Suddenly, the magic was broken and he found himself in the white office again, the memory shattering as suddenly as Chanyeol had shattered his heart years ago. 

 

Too lost in his own mind, he hadn’t noticed that Chanyeol’s eyes were now opened, still hooded by sleep as his unfocused gaze caught Baekhyun’s surprised one. He then took notice of how close they actually were now, their faces only inches apart as Baekhyun had unconsciously leaned closer, as if chasing the memory of their love, his hand still resting on Chanyeol’s shoulder. He could feel Chanyeol’s breath tickling his lips as silence settled over the room like a suffocatingly heavy blanket, warmth and cold simultaneously spreading through his veins with each rapid thud of his heart against his ribcage. They were close, too close, but he couldn’t move an inch, his whole being drowning in Chanyeol’s dark orbs.

 

"You.. You shouldn’t sleep here, Mr. Park," he broke the silence after a while, voice barely audible and shakier than he would have liked it to be. He had to pull away, put some distance between them, it was difficult to breath now, but Chanyeol’s gaze had him pinned down and he couldn’t even move an inch as he silently stared at the other.

 

"Did you just call me by my name?" he then asked, a shiver running down Baekhyun’s voice as his voice came out hoarse and low from sleep.

 

"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to," Baekhyun replied after a few seconds, biting his lower lip in distress and not missing the way Chanyeol’s gaze trailed down his face to focus on the movement. 

 

"It’s been a long time since I last heard you say my name," he mumbled, gaze still lost along the secretary’s lips.  Their voices were hushed, as if being loud would burst the bubble that had formed around them, and the shorter’s stomach stirred as the low timbre of Chanyeol’s voice tickled his ears.

 

It was also the first time since the first day that Chanyeol had brought up the past.

 

"I always loved the way you’d pronounce my name, so gently, as if saying it any other way would make it break as it stumbled out of your lips," Chanyeol continued, lowering his voice into a whisper when Baekhyun hadn’t replied and leaning even closer as if his body was controlled by something other than his own will. Baekhyun’s heart clenched at his words, the description of their past so accurate it was painful. Chanyeol had always been the most precious person that he ever had in his life and he had always been afraid of losing him. "Say it again, Baekhyun."

 

His breath hitched at the way the other pronounced his name, the sound so familiar yet so foreign as he hadn’t heard it in years. His mind was in a haze too by now, Chanyeol’s scent tickling his nose, his voice caressing his ears, his breath mixing in with Baekhyun’s as the latter’s gaze had now dropped to his lips, as if pulled in by some wicked force. 

 

"Chanyeol," he finally said after a few seconds, the name tickling its owner’s lips as the few inches separating them were slowly disappearing with each passing second. Baekhyun couldn't even know which one of them was leaning forward, but maybe they were both doing it at the same time, maybe their hearts were still linked to each other and were longing to finally meet each other again after all this time.

 

"Again," was the young man’s reply, voice carrying out the order with confidence and yearning, as if the name escaping Baekhyun’s lips was the only thing keeping him alive at the moment.

 

"Chanyeol," he repeated breathlessly, his eyelids slowly fluttering shut as he could almost feel the the other’d lips against his. "Chanyeol," he said again, the plea forming against the other’s lips as they brushed against Baekhyun’s without really pressing on it, only savoring the texture from afar, hesitantly. "Chanyeol," he formed the name with his lips again, quietly, only letting it come out as a breath.

 

That seemed to be the last straw for Chanyeol and Baekhyun suddenly found the young man’s lips pressed against his, softly at first, as if he wanted to take his time to rediscover the lips that had once solely belonged to him. Baekhyun was left frozen in his spot, too dazed to even properly realize that he was kissing the man who took his heart away and only gave it back in pieces. Chanyeol’s lips were still so soft, his lower lip was plump and his upper one thinner, they still fit perfectly against his, as if they were made to belong to each other. Only after a few seconds did Baekhyun find the strength to return the kiss, pressing back against the handsome man’s lips to make the kiss firmer which made Chanyeol gain confidence as his hand now cupped the shorter’s cheek, his palm warm against Baekhyun’s skin as his thumb gently caressed the apple of his cheek. Their lips moved together, embracing each other gently and keeping it chaste, simply enjoying the joy of finding each other again. Baekhyun was melting against Chanyeol, the hand that had been resting on his shoulder all this time moving to the back of his head, fingers carding through his hair before slipping down to settled on his nape. The position was uncomfortable as Chanyeol was still sitting down while he was still standing next to him, merely leaning down, his back was starting to hurt but that was the last thing on his mind at the moment. He could only focus on Chanyeol’s lips, Chanyeol’s scent, Chanyeol’s touch, Chanyeol’s warmth,  _Chanyeol_. He didn’t care about anything else at the moment. He didn’t care about anything.

 

Just like Chanyeol hadn’t cared about his all those years ago.

 

With that simple but poisonous thought, he felt electrocuted, his head spinning back into place. What was he doing? He suddenly broke the kiss, stepping back as if Chanyeol’s mere presence burned his skin. The latter looked up at Baekhyun, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, as if he couldn’t see why he would suddenly pull away and have this kind of reaction. As if it didn’t make sense. As if he had expected Baekhyun to simply forgot the fact that he had ruined the most beautiful thing he had ever had. 

 

"Baekhyun," he started, slowly standing up from his seat. "I-"

 

"Don’t," the shorter cut him off, voice trembling with anger, or was it pain? "This shouldn’t have happened."

 

"It shouldn’t have happened?" Chanyeol repeated, frown deepening in disapproval. The sight only fueled Baekhyun’s anger. Was this just a game to Chanyeol? Did he look that easy? "We both wanted it to happen."

 

"No, I didn’t want it to happen," he lied through gritted teeth. "We were supposed to keep things professional, don’t you remember?" he spat out, repeating some of the first words that they had exchanged on his first day.

 

"Things have changed since then," the other replied weakly, seemingly taken aback by his reaction. "Baekhyun, please…"

 

"What has changed?!" he asked, raising his voice a bit. "You haven’t changed one bit, Chanyeol, but I changed in all those years you were gone. I changed, I’m not the pathetic little boy who’d let you play with his heart." He let anger speak for him, the words that he had been holding in for so long finally spilling.

 

"I never played with your heart, don’t talk nonsense," Chanyeol retorted, and he recognize the tone in his voice, anger and pain. However, it was nothing compared to what Baekhyun was feeling.

 

"You’re right. You didn’t play with my heart, you shattered it with a single blow."

 

And even today, he wasn’t able to say he had managed to fix it completely. On the contrary, the cracks that were slowly starting to heal had only multiplied again in the few minutes they had spent tonight in this office. 

 

"Do you think I had the choice? You really think I’m a fucking heartless asshole?" Chanyeol raised his voice as well, stepping closer to Baekhyun who chose not to move back, not wanting the taller to think he was intimidated even if once again, every inch of his being wanted to disappear. "Do you really think I wanted to leave you?"

 

"You made it pretty clear that you wanted to leave me," he glared up at him.

 

"I didn’t have the choice, Baekhyun!" he screamed, making the secretary flinch even as confusion filled him.

 

"Stop screaming at me," he warned him, "What do you mean you didn’t have the choice? You always have the choice, Chanyeol."

 

"No, I didn’t fucking have any choice but to leave you. That was the best thing to do." Chanyeol’s hands suddenly grabbed his arms, forcing him to stay in his spot and listen to him.

 

"Breaking my heart was the best thing to do? You don’t make sense," Baekhyun retorted, trying to move out of his grip but Chanyeol was much stronger than he was and didn’t allow him to leave.

 

"I had to leave you," he replied, voice lowering down to a broken whisper. Baekhyun stopped struggling, looking up at him to find his dark orbs staring into his. They were filled with pain, regret, and emptiness. "It was better for you to hate me. Hating me would have forced you to move on after I left."

 

"Chanyeol, you’re draining me. Stop. Please, just stop and explain things clearly. Stop hurting me," he pleaded, confusion and pain swirling in him. He didn’t understand. It didn’t make sense. Why would Chanyeol want him to hate him? Why did he insist on crushing the last pieces of his heart down?

 

"Listen," the other started, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. "I never really talked to you about my family, I never really touched the topics of my parents either. Hell, I never even brought you to my own house," he chuckled, the sound coming off broken and pathetic, almost as if he was mocking himself. "I never liked talking about my family but I’ve always been this company’s heir and I’ve always known that one day I would have to take over my father, my future was already traced even before I was born. I had the freedom I wanted until high school, my parents didn’t want to suffocate me but… After high school, things were going to be different. We had already planned my studies overseas once I would have graduated."

 

Baekhyun remembered how Chanyeol never really gave him a reply whenever he would talk about university or whenever he would say that it would be really nice if they went to the same school. It used to sadden him a bit back then, but it seemed that Chanyeol had reasons for acting like that. However that didn’t help clear his confusion or help his broken heart, but before he could even question Chanyeol, the latter continued.

 

"I didn’t want to leave you, I negotiated with my parents many times but they didn’t accept letting me study in the university I wanted. They wanted me to get the best education possible in order to take over the company one day and that had to be in America. I really didn’t want to leave you," he sighed, stopping for a few seconds as if to gather his strength up and stupidly, Baekhyun found his heart warming up at his last words. "But I didn’t have the choice. I didn’t know how to tell you, I knew you were going to be really hurt and sad about it. I also knew that you would ask not to end things, you would have tried continuing our relationship and we would have slowly drifted apart. It would have destroyed you but you would still be waiting for me," he said and Baekhyun hated how right he was. He would have done all of these things if he had known. "I didn’t want you to be unhappy, not when I wouldn’t be able to be here to make you smile. I wanted you to move on, find happiness somewhere else even if I felt like ripping my heart out each time I even imagined you with someone else. But I knew you wouldn’t have agreed if I tried convincing you to end it and as stupid as it sounds, I thought that maybe it would be better if you hated me," he let out a small humorless laugh. "That’s why I said all those cruel things to you, I wanted you to hate me. That would have been the only way for you to be happy afterwards."

 

Silence settled over the room once Chanyeol pronounced his last words and Baekhyun wasn’t even sure if he was breathing anymore. Finally, he had replies to his question, his confusion tamed a bit. However, that wouldn’t erase the long years of pain he had been through.

 

"You’re so stupid," he whispered, barely noticing the beads of water escaping his eyes. "You’re so damn stupid, Chanyeol. Why do you take decisions on your own? Do you know what I’ve been through these past years?"

 

"Yes," he cut his, "Yes, because I’ve felt the same pain."

 

"No, you didn’t. Leaving someone behind is not the same as thinking all the memories you shared with your loved one were only meaningless lies and illusions that you were the only one to enjoy," Baekhyun sobbed out softly, too tired to be angry anymore. He was exhausted. 

 

"I’m sorry," Chanyeol apologized, stepping closer and hesitantly pulling him into his arms. "I’m so sorry, Baekhyun. I just wanted you to be happy but I destroyed both of us. I’m so stupid," he mumbled against his hair after pushing Baekhyun’s head to rest against his shoulder. The shorter was limp in his arms, too tired to protest. "Forgive me. Please, allow me to fix this. Please, Baekhyun," he pleaded and if Baekhyun wasn’t blinded by his own pain, he would have noted how trembly Chanyeol’s voice was, wobbling with unshed tears. 

 

Fix this? Could that be possible? Would he be able to ever forget the cruel words Chanyeol had thrown at him when they had been engraved into his mind for years? Would he even be able to trust Chanyeol with his heart again? How could he be sure that he wouldn’t shatter it once again?

 

He couldn’t risk it again.

 

He pulled away from Chanyeol’s hold, avoiding his gaze as he shook his head. "No," he whispered, his heart clenching in protest at the single word that left his mouth, but he ignored it. He couldn’t trust Chanyeol so easily again. "No, Chanyeol. I can’t… I can’t trust you again. Not now, maybe not ever. It was too painful, too painful for me to forget everything in one night."

 

He risked glancing up at him and regretted it immediately when his gaze met the broken look on Chanyeol’s face. Was this how Chanyeol had felt the day he had to end their relationship? He wasn’t sure but the look on his face made him want to apologize and beg him to take him back, because that was what Baekhyun had always wanted. He had always lived with the tiny glimmer of hope that Chanyeol would come back to him one day. His plan had been a failure, he hadn’t moved on, he hadn’t allowed anyone else into his heart, it only belonged to Chanyeol and that would never change. However, he couldn’t forgive him.

 

"Alright," CHanyeol said, arms hanging down limply as if he was drained too. "If that would make you happier, then alright," he continued, looking down.

 

"I’m sorry," Baekhyun said, looking at him for a few seconds before turning around. He had to leave this place. It was suffocating him. However, right as he stepped towards the door, a grip on his wrist stopped him.

 

"Just… Think about it please, I’m really sorry. I never stopped loving you, Baekhyun, not even for a single second in all those years. Don’t just throw the idea away, please think about it. I want to fix us."

 

Warmth spread through his chest at the knowledge that he wasn’t the only one to crave the other’s love but he chose not to reply, pulling his hand away from his hold to grab his bag and storm out of the room. He had a lot to think about.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The following days went smoother than Baekhyun had expected them to even if there was some tension hanging in the air between them ever since the conversation that had changed many things yet hadn’t helped in getting some progress between them. He wouldn’t deny the fact that his heart was lighter, the burden of Chanyeol’s words in the past was almost completely gone now that he knew the reason why the other had been so cruel with him but he obviously wouldn’t forget them in a single second. 

 

Chanyeol was also nicer now, his haughty attitude was gone and it was almost funny how he was doing his best to look good in the secretary’s eyes. Now that they had talked about the important issues, he was less tense and Baekhyun could even say that he was just like the Chanyeol he loved in the past, which wasn’t exactly a good thing as it made things harder for him. It was difficult to refuse something that was given to you after long years of awaiting, but Baekhyun didn’t want to rush things. Maybe that was also his way of punishing Chanyeol, but he mainly needed to know the other wouldn’t destroy him a second time, he wouldn’t be able to survive through it this time.

 

What made it harder was probably this strange tension between them though, he was experienced enough to title it as sexual tension, and he knew that he wasn’t the only one who felt it. They were more comfortable around each other now and unconsciously, they grew closer, their bodies sometimes drifting closer to each other without them noticing. Or at least, Baekhyun never really noticed it, he wasn’t sure whether Chanyeol was doing it on purpose or not. The small touches here and there were slowly driving him over the edge, their fingers brushing every time he would pass Chanyeol files or the usual cup of hot cocoa, the hand on the small of his back whenever they would be walking together, the playful jokes, and the attractive smirk. Chanyeol still had the same effect on him and it was almost unnerving. 

 

Those were the thoughts running through his mind as he stood inside the elevator, the usual cup of hot cocoa in his hands as he was headed towards the CEO’s office. He wondered how today would go, it was getting harder to be around Chanyeol and ignore his feelings as each day passed. The small ding of the elevator pulled him out of his thoughts and seeing that the door opened, he shuffled backwards to let people in. However, as the person who made the elevator stop appeared, his eyes widened.

 

"Mr. Kim!" he grinned, surprised yet happy to see his former boss here. 

 

"Funny to see you here, Baekhyun. I didn’t think I would bump into you," he said, mischievous smile hanging on his lips as he stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for the highest floor, where Baekhyun was heading too.

 

"Of course, it’s not like I’m the CEO’s secretary," he rolled his eyes, an amused chuckle leaving his lips afterwards. It was nice to see him here and Baekhyun was glad that he could still feel so comfortable around Jongdae. "What brings you here?"

 

"I decided not to make you miss the best boss in the world anymore and end my vacation," he joked, playfully nudging Baekhyun with his elbow and making him laugh softly. The elevator’s doors opened right then and they both stepped out, heading towards the CEO’s office.

 

"You’re coming back to work? I thought you would be away for a few more weeks."

 

"Well, you can’t be away for more than a few days when you’re a workaholic and it’s already been almost two months. I feel like I’m going to explode if I don’t start working now," he continued, heaving out an exaggerated sigh just to be dramatic as he stopped in front of Baekhyun’s desk, turning to him to continue their conversation.

 

"Well, I’m glad to see you back! What spot are you going to take though?"

 

"I’ll just go back to what I worked as before becoming the temporary CEO, I mainly worked on the board. We’ll discuss things today with Mr. Oh before I officially start next week." 

 

"That’s good, it’ll be nice to see you around again," he smiled genuinely.

 

"I agree," he replied, his gaze then shifting to the cup in his hand. "What’s this?"

 

"Oh that’s hot cocoa for Mr. Park, he doesn’t drink coffee," he explained, raising a brow when the other laughed. "Why are you laughing?"

 

"I just remembered something that happened with him when we were younger, that’s all," he shrugged, a smile lingering on his lips.

 

"You know each other since you were younger?" he asked, surprised.

 

"Of course, I’m only a few years older than him, we used to play together a lot when we were younger," he said before leaning to playfully whisper into Baekhyun’s ear. "But I was always the one winning every game."

 

Baekhyun burst into laughter at that, finding it quite amusing since he knew Chanyeol really hated losing and somehow the image of a small Chanyeol grumpily sulking in a corner after losing to Jongdae was far more amusing than it should be.

 

"What was the thing you remembered a while ago then? It must have been funny," he reminded him.

 

"Mind sharing with me too so I can laugh as loudly as you two?"

 

The sudden voice coming from behind startled Baekhyun a bit and he turned around, blinking in surprise when he found Chanyeol out of his office, arms crossed over his chest as he looked at them with a raised brow. Baekhyun couldn’t help but notice how fitting his shirt was, letting him see his toned biceps through the dark fabric.

 

"Oh, Mr. Park," Jongdae started, letting a few seconds pass to laugh at something that Baekhyun couldn’t even figure out before continuing. "We were simply catching up on some things since we haven’t seen each other in a long time."

 

"What would you need to catch up on with your old secretary? You aren’t even working here yet," he commented sternly and Baekhyun raised a brow when he recognized the jealousy hanging in his voice.

 

"Well, Baekhyun wasn’t a mere secretary, he was a great friend as well," Jongdae shrugged, seemingly not noticing Chanyeol’s reaction to his words, but the secretary didn’t miss the way his jaw clenched and unclenched rapidly.

 

That was quite interesting, it seemed that Chanyeol was as possessive as he had always been.

 

"Well, right now he’s  _my_ secretary and he’s late, most likely because of you."

 

"Oh really? How inconsiderate of me," Jongdae replied, lips curved into a wicked smile as he looked at Chanyeol. It seemed that he had finally caught up on the situation.

 

"It is. Baekhyun, bring in my schedule now and I hope the drink isn’t cold. Mr. Kim, please wait here until my secretary is done, he’ll let you in in a few minutes," he ordered, turning away and walking into his office without even waiting for a reply.

 

"I’m sorry, Mr. Kim, I guess he’s stressed out from work," Baekhyun apologized, despite knowing that this wasn’t the reason.

 

"It’s okay, I understand. You should go before he gets angrier, we’ll talk later," he smiled, the secretary returning it before quickly slipping into Chanyeol’s office and leaving Jongdae to wait there as his lips curved into an amused smile. "It looks like working here is going to be fun."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The same episode unfortunately happened a few more times, growing more and more frequent after Jongdae started working in the company again. He was one of the higher ups, meaning that his office was located in the same floor as Chanyeol’s and it was inevitable for Baekhyun to bump into him several times in a day. Chanyeol was rather unhappy with this situation from what he could see but he weirdly appreciated it, it was always amusing to see the young businessman grumpy and scowling each time he would catch his secretary with his former boss. Maybe Baekhyun also made sure to speak extra loud when he was with Jongdae.

 

When it came to Jongdae, it was indeed really nice to have him back in the company, everyone had missed him and the mood had went up as the man was back to throw smiles and encouraging words to everyone. That was the reason why Baekhyun had been crushing on him before, he was nothing but a comforting presence that managed to sooth him even in his worst days. However, there was nothing left of that now, his whole heart screamed Chanyeol and nothing he could do would be able to quiet it down. His barriers were slowly weakening and with each passing day, he yearned to accept Chanyeol’s offer and let him fix his heart.

 

However, it seemed that the CEO was unaware of that even today.

 

"There’s still a few hours before work ends don’t you both have things to do?" 

 

Baekhyun’s laughter was cut short by Chanyeol’s cold voice and he looked up at the CEO, Jongdae doing the same from his spot in front of the secretary’s desk.

 

"Come on, Chanyeol," he rolled his eyes, the casualness in which he did it reminding Baekhyun that he and Chanyeol were close friends, otherwise there was no way he would be able to keep his job. "We’re relaxing a bit, it’s tiring to always be serious, don’t you think so?"

 

"Your lifestyle doesn’t concern me as long as it doesn’t affect my money, but right not it does so please go back to work," he scowled irritatedly before his sharp gaze turned to Baekhyun. "We have things to discuss about the new project, Mr. Byun. Come to my office," he ordered, using Baekhyun’s last name for the first time since the night they shared a kiss. He knew then that the taller was angry but he couldn’t help but shudder a bit, the way he said it sounding almost thrilling to him.

 

"You’re so boring, Chanyeollie," Jongdae said, shaking his head in mock disappointment as Chanyeol narrowed his eyes in a silent threat. "Fine, fine, I’m going," he snorted before winking at Baekhyun playfully and strutting towards his own office afterwards, leaving the shorter surprised.

 

"Don’t make me repeat myself," Chanyeol said through gritted teeth before turning around and taking long strides towards his office. 

 

Baekhyun immediately stood up, his heart suddenly jumping in his ribcage. Was Chanyeol really angry at him? He didn’t want to upset him, even if this little game had been quite fun. Would it make him lose Chanyeol? He didn’t want that to happen. In spite of that, adrenaline was coursing through his veins and it oddly made him feel nice. He liked the other’s reaction, it showed that he cared and that he still had feelings for Baekhyun.

 

He stepped into the office, walking past Chanyeol who had been waiting for him at the door and moving to stand at the center of the room. However, the sound of the door locking up reached his ears and he turned to him, blinking in surprise.

 

"Why did you lock the door?" 

 

"What are you exactly trying to do, Baekhyun?" the taller asked as a reply, voice low with irritation and anger as he slowly stepped closer to the secretary who was frozen in his spot, not from fear, but from anticipation.

 

"I don’t know what you’re talking about," he replied even if he very well knew why Chanyeol was in this state. The other wasn’t good at controlling his jealousy.

 

"Are you having fun? Making me wait while you go and smile and laugh with Jongdae?" he continued, now standing in front of Baekhyun and towering over him as his stern glare was settled on his features. "Are you playing with me?"

 

"I’m not playing with you, Chanyeol. Mr. Kim is just a nice friend. Am I not allowed to have friends?" he retorted, trying his best not to let himself melt against the oher. He was enjoying this more than he should.

 

"You’re allowed to have friends. You’re not allowed to smile like that with him when I’m still patiently waiting for you to come to a decision and be mine again."

 

"How do you know I would want to be yours again?" he furrowed his eyebrows, even if he couldn’t even deny it. He had waited for years.

 

"Baekhyun," Chanyeol said, a low chuckle following out of his lips after the name. "I’m not blind. I can see how hard you’re trying to hold yourself back. I can see that you want it badly but you’re trying not to show it."

 

He sealed his lips shut, choosing not to reply. The way he turned the situation around was both irritating and attractive at the same time.

 

"See? You can’t even deny it," the young businessman said, curving his lips into a satisfied smile as he leaned down closer to Baekhyun, whispering his next words against his lips. "Stop torturing the both of us and let me have you already," he finished, letting hints of a plea dance in his voice, as if he wasn’t entirely sure that Baekhyun wanted him just as much. 

 

And at that moment, as he could feel Chanyeol’s breath tickling his lips, his gaze drowning into the other’s and yearning to explore each and every corner of the dark world they hid, Baekhyun couldn’t find it in himself to be stubborn and deny himself happiness anymore. He hated how Chanyeol had that effect on him, but he loved how he had the same effect on him. They were both doomed, but at least they would fall down together.

 

Without waiting for another second, he erased the small distance separating them and pressed his lips against the taller’s. Contrary to the first kiss they had shared in this office, this one wasn’t chaste or gentle, this one was hungry, passionate, and demanding. Chanyeol immediately sucked Baekhyun’s lower lip into his mouth, trapping it between his teeth to nibble at it, tongue swiping over the abused skin to sooth it before he repeated the whole process as his hands settled on the smaller’s waist, pulling him against his lean body. Baekhyun’s arms immediately sneaked around Chanyeol’s neck and he returned the kiss with as much passion, small sounds of pleasure escaping him with each small nibble and suction on his lip. Their tongues then tangled together in Baekhyun’s warm cavern, Chanyeol’s slick muscle chasing his and playing with it ardently as they both poured their hunger and their longing into the kiss.

 

The taller’s lips then chose to get adventurous and he broke the kiss, letting his soft couplets trail over Baekhyun’s jaw, savoring the taste of his skin before they slid down to his neck, feeling the vibrations as the secretary voiced out his satisfaction with small sounds, nibbling and sucking, painting small marks on Baekhyun’s unblemished canvas urgently, as if he feared that he would slip out of his hold anytime. However, Baekhyun was too lost in everything that was Chanyeol to even think about escaping this time, he wanted this, he yearned for this, he longed to be loved by the man who could shatter his heart as much as he could fix every little crack on it. 

 

"You’re driving me crazy," he heard the other mumble against his neck breathlessly, sending a shiver down Baekhyun’s spine as the only thing he could reply with was a soft hum, lust and pleasure flowing into him and clouding his mind enough for him not to be able to function properly. "I missed you so damn much, Baekhyun," Chanyeol whispered before his lips latched on another patch of skin at the junction between his neck and his shoulder, teeth and tongue working on marking the man he loved as his while his soft moans caressed his ears.

 

"You’re still mine, Baekhyun. Even after all this time, you’re still mine. Don’t ever forget that," he said as he pulled away, dark orbs locking in with Baekhyun’s. "Did you miss me?" he asked, almost like a child who wanted to be reassured, and Baekhyun’s heart clenched because yes, yes he did. It was a miracle he even was able to survive so long without Chanyeol. Or survive while being so near to him yet unable to let himself love the other.

 

"I did. I missed you, Chanyeol," he whispered, warmth spreading through his veins as he bared his feelings in front of him, finally completely trusting Chanyeol with his love.

 

Chanyeol curved his lips into a smile, an almost relieved one that took Baekhyun’s breath away before the spark of lust that shone in the other’s eyes burst into a flame and danced in his dark orbs. "Then show me how much you missed me." His voice had gained its usual authoritative tone again, the order seeping into Baekhyun’s mind as he almost whimpered in front of him. He knew what Chanyeol wanted him to do even before his hands pressed down on his shoulders until he found himself on his knees. 

 

His gaze fell on the tent in the other’s black slacks and he sunk his teeth in his lower lip as he didn’t waste a second, bringing his hand up to cup his bulge, gently massaging it with his palm before moving to unbutton and pull the zipper down, revealing his dark underwear. With hurried movements, he pulled his pants down, the underwear following the same path to pool on his ankles, baring his hardened member. He couldn’t help but stare at it for a second, the action not going unnoticed by Chanyeol who moved his hand down to wrap his fingers around the base of his shaft, as his other hand cupped Baekhyun’s cheek. "Show me how much you missed it, Baekhyun," he repeated, voice low with desire as his gaze met Baekhyun’s when the latter looked up at him. Then, Chanyeol slowly pulled him closer with the hand that was on his cheek, until the tip of his member brushed against Baekhyun’s plump lower lip, his gaze shifting to admire the sight as the secretary’s gaze remained on his features. He let Chanyeol lead at first, waiting until he pushed more of his member between his lips, until the crown settled in Baekhyun’s warm cavern and the taste of pre come invaded his mouth. He had never been fond of the taste but pleasuring Chanyeol had always been something he liked doing and this wasn’t a problem, he could do it for him. His own hand raised to push Chanyeol’s hand away, his long fingers replacing the latter’s and wrapping around his member before his eyes closed and he pushed his head forward, taking in as much as he could as he heard Chanyeol’s breath hitching, that small sound enough to make flames of lust wrap around Baekhyun’s body. He started bobbing his head up and down, gradually going is as far as he could as his other hand settled on the other’s hip as leverage, he took more of him with each movement of his head, his fingers making up for what he couldn’t fit in his mouth and slowly, he fastened the pace, cheeks hollowing as a soft hum of appreciation escaped him, sending vibrations around Chanyeol’s shaft. 

 

The handsome man watched as Baekhyun’s lips stretched around him, slowly reddening as a result of the friction between their skin, soft grunts of pleasure escaping his own lips as the hand that had been on Baekhyun’s cheek moved to the back of his head, fingers tangling in his hair as pleasure shot through his body. The small sounds only fueled the fire in the pit of Baekhyun’s stomach and he fastened the pace, feeling the head hit the back of his throat as Chanyeol let out a louder grunt. He felt him move a bit, probably with the intention of thrusting into his mouth even if it was unconscious but he tightened his grip on the other’s hips to stop him, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to take it. It had been a long time since he had last done this for someone and he preferred keeping things at his pace. Chanyeol seemingly didn't mind, too lost in the pleasure surging through his veins.

 

Soon enough, he felt the taller try pulling away and even if he felt like protesting, Baekhyun understood from the look on his face that if he went on for longer, he would have released in his mouth. "I want to feel you now," Chanyeol explained, chest heaving up and down as he gripped Baekhyun’s arm to pull him back up on his feet. 

 

Chnayeol stepped out of the clothes on his feet as his hands quickly worked on getting every piece of clothing separating them out of the way, their lips meeting again in a kiss full of hunger as Baekhyun let him bare his body. He stepped forward and with each step he took, Baekhyun took one backwards until eventually, he felt the back of his legs hit the edge of the desk. Chanyeol broke the kiss again, letting his breath fall from his parted lips to caress Baekhyun’s as he blindly reached behind the latter to move any obstacle out of the way. Fortunately, the desk was relatively clean and empty since Chanyeol liked to keep things ordered so there was enough room for them to continue without causing any major damage. 

 

Without any word, Chanyeol suddenly spun him around so his back would face his front and he pushed Baekhyun down until he was bended over the desk, his cheek pressed against the hard surface as a soft whimper escaped his lips at the cold against his skin, contrasting with the warmth of Chanyeol’s hands as they rested on his hips. One of them left his hips and he heard some rustling, Chanyeol fumbling around and seemingly looking for something that Baekhyun figured out only when he heard the uncapping of a bottle.

 

"You’re still so beautiful, Baekhyun," he heard behind him and even if he had expected it, he still let out a soft sound when he felt a finger prodding at his entrance, a mix between surprise and pleasure, when he felt the cold product coating Chanyeol’s digit smearing on his skin. He felt the single digit slowly push into him, spreading his walls apart as gentle lips pressed on his shoulder, trailing kisses down towards his nape and distracting him from he sting. The next words that he heard were even more unexpected however, three little words that he had been longing to hear once again after all these years, three little words that meant the world to him, whispered against his heated skin. "I love you."

 

Chanyeol’s voice seeped into his mind, oddly heightening the pleasure that he was feeling and he hadn’t even noticed that a second finger had slipped in along with the first until the man fastened the pace of their movement, soft sounds of pleasure escaping his parted lips as he forced himself to ignore the pain. "I love you," Chanyeol repeated and Baekhyun couldn’t reply, choking up as he felt tears prevent any word from escaping his mouth. He simply listened, marking those words into his head, storing them next to the memories of a younger Chanyeol whispering them against his ear, his lips, his cheek. 

 

Suddenly, emptiness replaced Chanyeol’s fingers as he pulled them out and a soft whimper escaped his lips, a protest forming on his tongue before morphing into a soft moan when the next thing he felt was so much better. Something bigger pressed against his entrance and he felt Chanyeol slowly push in, the plump head nudging between his rim before venturing in, Baekhyun moaning softly as his tight warmth sucked Chanyeol in, pleasure and pain simultaneously flowing into him in waves and only doubling when Chanyeol didn’t wait, immediately starting to buck his hips to thrust into him. It was quick and harsh, the sound of skin slapping against skin interlacing with their soft moans of pleasure in the air. "I love you," he repeated again, voice gentle and lucid in spite of the overwhelming pleasure clouding his mind, as if stating a fact that would never ever change, no matter what.

Amidst the waves of pleasure and need, as he became one with Chanyeol once again, Baekhyun wanted to scream it out, he wanted Chanyeol to know his feelings, he wanted him to know that never once had his heart ever stopped beating for him. He felt strong enough to say it now, with Chanyeol’s warmth wrapped around him, his voice cradling his broken heart and slowly healing it. "I love you too," he whispered, voice not louder than a whisper, words almost lost between the moans of pleasure but he knew Chanyeol had heard him. He always did, no matter how many people were in a room, no matter how loud it was, his gaze would alway find Baekhyun and he would always listen to each of his words carefully, drinking in everything that he would say to him.

 

As if fueled by his words, Chanyeol’s movements only got harsher, thrusts quickening, fingers digging into the skin of Baekhyun’s waist, breath turning heavier, and as he felt heat pooling into his stomach, Baekhyun was in no better state. Soft moans slipped out of his mouth even if he tried holding them in, staying as quiet as possible since they weren’t alone in the building. However it soon became too much for him and his eyes rolled back into his skull, a flash of white exploding behind his eyelids as he climaxed, staining his abdomen and the dark wood of the desk. Chanyeol’s thrusts turned sloppy, movements harsh and uncontrolled as he sought for his own pleasure, the tightening of Baekhyun’s walls around him driving him over the edge until he painted his insides white with pleasure, their voices dancing together in the air. 

 

Everything calmed down after that, the rush in Baekhyun’s veins slowing down for him to try controlling his breath again even if it became difficult when he felt Chanyeol dropping on him, his chest resting against Baekhyun’s back as he nuzzled his nose against his neck, his breath hitting the shorter’s skin in disturbed rhythms. 

 

"I love you," Chanyeol whispered into his ear after a few seconds, when they were both calm enough to register their own words and pronounce them sincerely.

 

This time, there was no hesitation as he answered, the words freeing his heart from the pain left behind by the traces of each memory he wanted to forget. 

 

"I love you too," he breathed out, his heart fluttering in content when those words finally escaped his lips, for the second time that night.

 

He felt the handsome man laugh softly against his skin, the pure sound of happiness settling into his heart and chasing away the tear stains. He could love Chanyeol again now, he could trust him with his heart, he knew he would take care of it and treat it like the most precious thing he had in his possession. Baekhyun could allow himself to be happy again, each breath he would take from now on holding a whole new meaning.

 

Chanyeol slowly pulled out of him, a soft whimper leaving Baekhyun’s lips at the sudden emptiness replacing him, however it was okay, the emptiness in his heart had been filed and it would remain that way until the day he would give his last breath away. The taller helped him stand up, gentle hands spinning him around until Baekhyun could face the love of his life again, the other’s loving and fond gaze welcoming his. As if pulled by some unexplainable force, their lips met each other again, a simple chaste touch connecting them as they both basked in the feeling of being able to love the other freely, without any fear, without any regret. 

 

"If this hadn’t happened, I was ready to fire Jongdae tomorrow," Chanyeol said, bursting their bubble and causing Baekhyun to lose himself in a fit of laughter. Strong arms wrapped around him, pulling him against Chanyeol’s bare chest and he shook his head a bit, melting into his embrace.

 

"You’re so stupid."

 

"Doesn’t change the fact that you still love me."

 

"No, it doesn’t," he replied, lips curved into a smile as he felt happiness bubble in his chest and spread through his whole body. 

 

Nothing would ever change the fact that he loved Chanyeol, he would make sure of that.


End file.
